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Living on the Edge of Mainstream

© Rebecca Phillips

reprinted with permission from Secular Unschooling Australia, message 1161

Sometimes it's hard being a homeschooling mum, trying to fit everything into our crowded days. It's hard living up to our own expectations, let alone those of others... Living on the edge of the 'mainstream', feeling like we don't quite belong to one world or another and the whole process of deschooling is a theme we chatted about on one of the support groups recently.

You are far from alone thinking you don't quite fit into one world or another. Do any of us though really? I'm quite sure that even the most tolerant of "radical unschoolers" still have their days when their tolerance all but dries up.

When it comes to the housework thing, I think that those that had parents who were very house proud are programmed to feel uncomfortable when the house is getting chaotic. Some might remember me saying that my Dad would vacuum so that he left no footprints in the pile - and then expect us not to walk over it until Mum came home! It sure pulls strings inside my brain when I see things getting heavily cluttered. I have learnt though, to keep in the forefront of my mind, that what matters most to me is my relationship with my kids - not my clean floor. My new mantra is "Housework might not kill me, but why take the chance?" - and I have the fridge magnet to prove it!

Even if we only live on the edges of the mainstream, it still effects us. In the ways that we've been raised, our own educational experiences and the people we associate with. This goes far beyond just de-schooling - rather de-mainstreaming I think!!

I still believe in my heart that, even on the bad days, my children are better off at home with a parent who loves them to bits than in an environment where they are just another head to fill with "knowledge". To me it's more about who my children are than what they know. Working on our relationships is a far greater priority than making sure they know lots of irrelevant stuff. I just have to keep reminding myself of this when I overhear the neighbours discussing my children's "education"!


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photo of Beverley and Robin PainePioneering members of the home education movement in Australia, Beverley and Robin Paine are passionate advocates of true educational choice for families. They began homeschooling their children in 1986 and three years later started the South Australian Home Based Learners network. Beverley wrote Getting Started with Homeschooling in 1995-97 and since then continues to write books and booklets on home education. She balances spending time helping home educators with working in her garden and renovating her home, as well as continuing to build her collection of writing on a variety of homeschooling subjects. Beverley maintains an extensive collection of websites as well as several Yahoo groups supporting families teaching their children at home. In 2007 Beverley joined the HEA and was a committee member for three years during which time she edited and produced the HEA Newsletter, Stepping Stones for Home Educators magazine, annual Resource Directory and other HEA publications. If you'd like to keep in touch with what Beverley is up to her in her life, sign up for the Homeschool Australia Newsletter or visit her Homeschool Australia Facebook page.
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